Dr. Erin Watson, wrote an excellent article I’d like to pass along to you, with her permission. In this article, Dr. Watson addresses a question that both she and I are asked frequently by new FSA adult survivor clients: “How long before I am healed?”
An important, sometimes even critical, aspect of recovering from family scapegoating abuse (FSA) is to recognize that you may have developed a ‘false’ or ‘survival’ self very early in life to survive a hostile or threatening family environment.
Betrayal is at the heart of being scapegoated. Betrayal is the constant in all the examples shared in this article. When exploring our scapegoating histories we see that our trauma doesn’t just come from the hurtful actions, the cruel words, the painful neglect and humiliations, or the psychological wounds wielded out by family members. Our trauma extends beyond tangible incidents: It permeates our psyches and our physiology…
Abuse of any type can result in the victim experiencing complex trauma and betrayal trauma, which can in turn lead to dissociation….
Those who were cast in the role of “identified patient” in their dysfunctional or abusive family system are subjected to pains and losses that in many cases have no clearly defined name, and are not even on the radar of the professionals and clinicians brought in to help. Furthermore, the scapegoat’s pains are often ignored, denied and even used against them by those who claim to care about them and love them most…